Escape From New Street

from by The Brooms of Destruction

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  • Compact Disc (CD) + Digital Album

    Our new double 'studio' album, Derelict, is finally here!

    A double CD, featuring extra tracks not available online, in a hand made card CD case, plus free digital album download - bargain! Plus all profits from sales will go to charity, split between the SPEAK Network (social justice campaigns www.speak.org.uk) and the RSPB (wildlife conservation www.rspb.org.uk)!


    50% of the sale profits from each CD Album sold will be donated to the RSPB, a registered charity in England and Wales, number 207076, and in Scotland, number SC037654, and 50% to The SPEAK Network via the SPEAK Trust, Registered Charity No.1112979.

    Includes unlimited streaming of Derelict via the free Bandcamp app, plus high-quality download in MP3, FLAC and more.
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lyrics

Attention! This is a platform alteration
The train now leaving Platform 9 at Birmingham New Street Station
Was the 8:15 for Waterloo you were waiting for on Platform 2
While I calmly spouted useless information

Attention! Please don’t leave your bags unattended
Or they’ll end up in the same black hole as every penny that Railtrack expended
For somewhere in the darkness lurks the dreaded engineering works
That’ll keep your train eternally suspended

And you’ll hear the spine chilling tales of those who live to tell of their ordeal
Behold with fear the event horizon of the rails
Oh my friend, beware, things happen there so surreal

I kid you not, you’d be better off at London Kings Cross
Unless you know where the New Street trains all go
You can buy yourself a return ticket, but in this hole that won’t get you toss, oh no
You won’t ever get home via Birmingham New Street!

Attention! This is a platform alteration
Platform 9 has disappeared to the ethereal 5th dimension
The concourse may display the signs but the platform screens show different times
Will you ever escape this bleak abomination?

The next six trains to Derby have been replaced
By a single 12-seat minibus, and the driver’s been misplaced
If you queue out in the rain all night it might take you to the Isle of Wight
But if you want to get to Derby you’re in the wrong place

And you’ll hear the spine chilling tales of the few that lived to tell of their ordeal
Behold with fear the event horizon of the rails
Oh my friend, beware, things happen there that are just unreal

I kid you not, you’d be better off at London Kings Cross
Unless you know where the New Street trains all go
You can buy yourself a return ticket, but in this hole that won’t get you toss, oh no
You won’t ever get home via Birmingham New Street!

Fifty trains have arrived today but they’re stuck in the queue to depart
In a log-jam tailback all the way to the Edinburgh line where they start
In the Birmuda Traingle of Britain there are too many trains, too few lines
And they’re all trying to leave at 2:15 from Platform 9

I kid you not, you’d be better off at London Kings Cross
Unless you know where the New Street trains all go
You can buy yourself a return ticket, but in this hole that won’t get you toss, oh no
You won’t ever get home via Birmingham New Street!

credits

from Derelict, released March 24, 2014

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about

The Brooms of Destruction UK

Passionately silly musicians, writing & playing an eclectic bunch of songs about world issues and cookies. Met while reading at Reading Uni.

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